Monday, May 18, 2009
One word to sum it all up...
Today, while running at the track, I realized something horrible. I have changed and it has not been for the better.
The word many of my college classmates would have used to describe me- ambitious. The word many of my college friends would have used to describe me- passionate. The word that came to mind today while sitting in church yesterday- directionless.
I graduated from high school third in my class, STAR student (designation for the student with the highest SAT/ACT in a graduating class), graduated from college with a 3.82 (4.0 in my major) and was named an inaugural Gates scholar and earned the highest GPA of any minority student in my graduating class in my perspective college. I earned my master’s degree in a year, completed a specialist degree in a year and a half (while working full time), was named teacher of the year, STAR teacher (designation for the teacher who had the most influence on the STAR student- see reference above- in a graduating class) and today I realize that I have absolutely no idea about where my career is headed.
I once had focus… real focus. I once had a clear plan for my life. I wanted to be a teacher and then become an administrator. I thought the sky was the limit.
What makes this directionless conundrum even more problematic is that the sky is still the limit. I have the degrees, the experience, the accolades and the certification to do a number of things. What I lack, however, is the plan... the direction... to be honest... the ambition.
I have some decisions to make.