Atlanta is Burning…

The Atlanta I moved to is not the Atlanta I live in.

I visited Atlanta during the hey-day for Hotlanta. There was Club Fusion (off Amsterdamn) and the Legendary Traxx (located off Luckie Street). Both clubs were two floors and had different types of music playing on both levels. There was Loretta’s on Spring Street and the Palace on Sundays. And for the older girls, we had Bulldogs.

But all good things must come to an end. Loretta’s closed and re-opened as 708 (for teeny-boppers and those who love them) and the Palace closed altogether. But, for the older girls, Bulldogs remained.

When I moved to Atlanta, as the hey-day began to wane, a new wave of clubs had already taken over. We had Colours on Fridays, Legendary Traxx (a twenty-year institution) on Saturday at their new Atlanta Live location, and the Lions Den on Sunday. And for the older girls, we had Bulldogs.

But again, all good things must come to an end. Colours and The Lion’s Den have gone the way of Loretta’s and the Palace. Legendary Traxx does not seem so legendary now as it has moved twice in five years. Currently located in the heart of the hood, where it is not all good, the new Memorial Drive/Covington Highway (DECATUR) location had not caught on with a lot of club-goers. But, for the older girls, Bulldogs remained.

We do have D’Jango’s, a hot box, on Sunday and we have Trademark, a hot box, on Fridays. And on Saturday, we have an entertainment black hole. No venue exists for clubbing on Saturdays. And for the old girls, we have Bulldogs.

Hotlanta has been extinguished. Girls, Atlanta is extinguished. Now we live in the A-T-L and damn it, it’s just not the same.

My Life, from A to Z...

A is for your age:
29- Hey, I got a few months left before I become an official thirtysomething…

B is for your burger of choice:
Wendy’s Stack Attacks are good, but my favorite burger is Thumb’s Up’s The Burger, add cheese.

C is for the car that you drive:
A pick-up truck… Honestly… A Titan.

D is for dog’s name:
My old roommate, Chris had a dog named, Bella. Ew. She looked like a damn Bella.

E is for an essential item you use each day:
Toilet. Ah.. sweet relief.

F is for your favorite television show:
Big Love

G is for favorite game:
Hide n Go Get!

H is for hometown:
Meridian, Mississippi

I is for instruments played:
Piano- for like a week. Don’t tell me how to hold my damn hands! This swishy wristy belongs to me, guh!

J is for favorite juice:
Cranberry- with vodka

K is for what you’d like to kick:
Sweets. I gotta break this bad habit… (Destiny’s Child)

L is for last restaurant you dined at:
Joe’s on Juniper- a cool ATL hang-out with reasonable drinks for the girls…

M is for your favorite Muppet:
Miss Piggy… Alas, I understand your longing for a man you cannot have.

N is for number of piercings you have:
Two. Both ears…

O is for overnight hospital stays:
One. I had a hernia.
P is for people you were with today:
Just Double Dees and Parker

Q is for what you do in quiet times:
Sleep

R is for regrets:
Damn, there is not enough room…

S is for status:
ON LOCK DOWN!

T is for time you woke up today:
3:00 p.m.

U is for what you consider unique:
People who love getting fisted… or people who use a sound… unique I’d say…

V is for favorite vegetable:
Salad. Tossed salad, that is…

W is for your worst habit:
Eating… Damn it!

X is for x-rays you have had:
None.

Y is for yummy food you ate today:
Marble Slab’s lemon ice cream

Z is for zodiac sign:
Scorpio

And now its your turn on your blog...

Some more answers...

Turn me up a lil wants to know:
Why will you forever love Atlanta?
Atlanta is an amazing city as both visitors and residents alike will agree. Where else in America can you go and find people who look like me and love like me and are able to express themselves and their love with reckless abandon? I love it. I actually have a blog in progress giving you 26 reasons why I love Atlanta.

Do you still masturbate even though you're involved with someone?
Yes. We both do, and often we do it together.

What are your goals for the rest of 2008?
1. Continue working on a book I am authoring/editing with two fellow bloggers.
2. Make significant progress on my dissertation.
3. Strengthen my partnership with Parker.
4. Continue my physical diet and my debt diet.

C. Baptiste Williams wants to know
How long will you run from Parker's parents?
When Parker comes out to his parents and they have time to deal with it, I will be happy to re-introduce myself.

Does the overt gayness of Tabernacle ever bother you?
I have grown to truly appreciate Tabernacle Baptist Church. I go to church to grow spiritually, not to judge or be judged. If you go to Tabernacle with a mind for Christ and for the word, you will not notice any “overt gayness.” I did at first, mind you, but I grew beyond that.


Why do you have a damn cat?
I wrote about Aristotle last year. He was a gift from my ex, Tim. In a way, I think he was Tim’s way of saying I would be alone- just an old spinster with a cat.

Q wants to know:
Miley Cyrus or Jamie Lynn Spears?
Jamie Lynn Spears, all the way!

Fuzzy wants to know
Why or how did you become a blogger?
I became a blogger after reading the 2006 Person of the Year Issue of Time Magazine, which proclaimed that YOU were the person of the year. BLogging had made a significant impact on the world, and I wanted to contribute. During the same week, Southern Voice Magazine (SoVo), which caters to gay men and women, profiled the best gay blogs in Atlanta and featured His Story 2 as the blog of the year. I read the blog, loved it, and the rest became history.

What would you consider your biggest downfall, why?
I am a sucka for love… D-Woods crooned it best. I overindulge. I eat too much, spend too much, and love too much.

If you were to die 5 min from now, and had to give one last piece of wisdom to the world, what would it be?
The only opinion of you that ever mattered is the opinion you have of yourself. You are what you perceive yourself to be

Some answers...

4gotten asks:
1. Who or what has had the biggest impact on your life and how?
Growing up in the rural south, I have had a lot of people provide a significant impact on my life, but the greatest impact would be a professor I had in college. The instructor was actually over the orientation program at my college and was in the division of student affairs. I was selected as an orientation leader and worked with him personally. He is an amazing human. He is always positive and optimistic, at least in front of us, and that really had an impact on me. At points in our two years together, I know he was going through some hardships with family and work. And from that I learned that regardless of what is happening in my life, I must learn to keep things in perspective and hold to the resounding truth of my resillance. I really can make it through the darkest night.
2. What is the one thing you want to do but haven't gotten around to doing yet?(in any aspect of your life)
Oh dear. I am working on a dissertation and I have yet to complete it. Hmmm. It is a major disappointment for me. I should have finished last year and I shelved it. When a good friend/classmate stopped writing, so did I.
3. Do you believe you can have or will make a difference in this world.(how or why) I know I make a difference in the world. I am a teacher and a friend to my friends. I know that people’s lives are impacted from what I try to bring into their lives.

Darius T. Williams wants to know…
1. How are the new living arrangements?
Darius, things are a rollercoaster, but in a good way. Parker and I fight constantly and love constantly. I have no regrets thus far. We are slowly ironing out lil kinks in the fabric.
2. What have you learned ALREADY that you didn't know before the living arrangements changed?
I have learned that we both suck at housekeeping. I have a good friend who owns a housekeeping business, but I thought I would get to save money each month by having help from Parker. Clearly, that is not the case. He just left this morning.
3. Did you make that damn smothered chicken for the boy yet? A word about that chicken.
Growing up, I never had smothered chicken. I need the recipe, with specific instructions, and I will make it and post photos. I did make a great gospel CD, however, in large part thanks to Fuzzy.

Young, Black, and DL wants to know...
1. Do you have a fetish with fetishes? I am a Scorpio. What else can I say? Simply put, yes.
2. By being in a shackn' up relationship, do you have to have sex every night?... I mean is it expected?
We don’t have “sex” every night or every week. We don’t bust every night, but most nights we do. It’s not expected, though. I don’t think.
3. Have you and Parker ever had a threesome, and if not, would you? Oh shit… Well, we are both in favor of threesomes as a concept… Um, I don’t know how much more I am allowed to say about that…

So tell me... what do you want to know?

It’s Wednesday! Go ahead and ask me anything… I will (taking a note from beloved blogger BulletProofSoul) answer three questions per visitor (up to twenty one questions) and post answers on Friday!

Meet the Parents II: Meet the Parkers!

So of course I met Parker’s parents. I was not going to. I had no intentions of meeting them and Parker was fine with this. He knows how harsh his parents can be. But I had to know, for myself, what this family was like.

His dad is handsome, an elected official (that’s all I’m allowed to say) and his mom is also very pretty… regally so. She’s tall, fair skinned, beautiful hair. And his sister looks like his mom.

When they arrived, I was in my room. Parker greeted them, told them they could sit down. I came out of our bedroom (the master suite is on the main floor) and said hello (my voice deeper, my walk swaggered a bit). All smiled.

I walked out the front door and I did not come home until Parker texted to say everyone was gone.

Meet the parents... um... No!

Parker’s parents are coming to visit from North Carolina for a week and I am horrified.

To imagine what the people who raised this rigid man must be like has actually caused nightmares.

I do not plan to be home when they come to the house. They do not know me or about me and I agree that we should keep it that way.

My mother supports my choices- she was not given a choice. She speaks to Parker when she calls and is always polite. She even agrees to respect my wishes for my estate if I die an untimely death.

I wish all parents could be as accepting.

What do you think about this?

On the cover of this week’s New Yorker, Barak Obama and his wife Michelle are portrayed as Islamic fundamentalist enjoying a victorious taking over of America. Editor David Remnick views this as satire. Numerous Obama supporters are angry. What do you think of this recent controversy? Is this simple satire or do you think it is a deliberate attempt to feed into the hysteria and lies being perpetuated by the Republican/Conservative press? Or something else entirely?

Jesse Jackson said he would cut Obama’s balls off if he didn’t stop talking down to black America. Is Obama being constructive to the black community by condemning the issues that affect black people in America or is he being destructive and self-serving by saying the things many think white conservative Americans want to hear?

Drunk Amy Winehouse called Kanye West a cunt during a show in London. Before Jay-Z performed, she asked the crowd, “Are there any black people in the crowd?” She then went on to praise Jay-Z, saying “The man has got bollocks to come here, and play the tunes you don't even know you remember. Imagine if it was a cunt like Kanye West. 'Cunts Like Kanye' - that should be his next album title." Be mindful that just last month a video leaked showing Drunk Amy singing ” Blacks, Pakis, Gooks and Nips. And deaf and dumb and blind and gay!" What do you guys thinks about Amy Winehouse? Are you still willing to support her?

I had no idea that Raz B (of B2K) was alleging that Chris Stokes sexually molested him. The swagger issue of Vibe magazine (Usher cover) did a great article on the allegations. Do you think the allegations against Chris Stokes are true?

The economy is getting worse. June was the cruelest month and according to Tuesday’s New York Times, a rebound is unlikely to happen until late 2009. Unemployment continually rises and housing values continue to fall. Does anyone else think we are all screwed and should be hoarding money?

The economy sucks. Parker and his friends and I and my friends were supposed to go whitewater rafting this weekend, but because of high gas prices and inflation, we are going to just stay in Atlanta and get drunk… Washington Apples for everyone! Um, am I the only person not able to take a vacation this summer?

Speak, Pastor... Speak!

“You have to put yourself behind yourself in a relationship.”

I love my church. I cannot believe I have come to admit this, but Tabernacle Baptist Church is an amazing church home.

On Sunday, my pastor spoke about the true meaning of two of the beatitudes regarding mercy and a pure heart from Matthew’s recollection of the Sermon on the Mount (but it might have been a sermon on a plain as stated in Luke).

He emphasized that in order to obtain God’s mercy, we must be merciful to our fellow man. He stressed forgiveness and the offering of help and love when neither is deserved. Meredith explained that God shows us mercy when we have done things to warrant his wrath. God shows us grace by allowing us the lives we don’t deserve.

Next, Meredith emphasized the meaning of a pure heart, which is needed to see God. He spoke on the things that dirty and sullen our heart- the most detrimental being ego.

Yipes.

Meredith said ego holds us back and makes us self-seeking and self serving in our relationships. He said ego makes us give and expect something in return. He said ego makes us please our partners only so we can be pleased in return.

He then said in order for us to truly have a pure heart, we must act out of love and not ego. He said we must learn to put ourselves last and our lovers first, neither expecting nor hoping for reciprocity.

It seems like Meredith had just the word I needed to hear. I came home and made Sunday dinner for my man.

Parker loves playing with my cat...

A constant point of contention for Parker and I has been Aristotle, the cat.

Um, a word about this cat of mine. I never wanted a cat. I hate animals. Aristotle was a gift, a read, from my ex- Tim.

Aristotle fits his name. He's a slight snide.

He glides around the house like he owns it.

He is prone to bursts of cuteness when he wants something (food that I am eating, usually) and he is able to give face on the drop of a dime.

But oh, cats, by nature, can be quite fickle and persnickety. Whenever I feel and urge towards kindness and go to pet this pussy, he runs. Whenever I am lounging, with no inclination towards stroking my pussy, he jumps on me and purrs for affection. I tired of his emotional rollercoaster years ago (it's been three years if you want to know).

Parker, however, adores this cat. He talks to him, pets him, and even puts the cat in the bed (my side of the bed, if you must know). It infuriates me. Now, Aristotle basically lives in Parker's lap. Disgusting.

I, however, have a little plan for Ms. Aristotle. Since he is so enamored with Parker, why not let Parker feed him or empty his litter box. Hmmph. Let's see Parker show some monetary affection towards this finicky feline. Ms. Aristotle will make it a month, at best, before he's crawling around the house looking quite Aushwitzy (no shade, holocaust survivors. Some of my best friends are jewish…)

A drag queen saved my life (and my relationship)

Tonight, we finally made up.

After a weekend of anger, suspicions, and accusations, Parker agreed to go to the Monday Night Variety Show at the Jungle starring the Atlanta Stars of the Century.

While Necole Luv Dupree lip-synced and shimmed to Jennifer Hudson's spotligh, I reached over and took Parker’s hand. He loves that song and he could not help but smile.

When the rock socking Raquel Lord “performed” a melody of Rhianna hits, going from a formal gown to bare ass naked, we both laughed. I knew then that he had finally cracked.

Tonight was nice. After we came home, we made love and plan to sleep close. I hope all is well that cums well.

Three things about America...

Yesterday’s Oprah was surprisingly interesting. Her topic was “What I love about America.” Teddy bears, band aids, and hot dogs are all staples of Oprah’s America. As we celebrate our nation’s independence, what are three things you love and three things you hate about our country?

Three things I love about America:
Freedom of Speech- Only in America can a man wear a shirt portraying the first black man that will win the U.S. presidency as monkey. And it’s okay. We all have a right to think and feel as we do. In America, not only do we have a right to an opinion, but we have a right to express that opinion.

Red, White, and Blue- I love these colors together. And I love Ralph Lauren for making so many great clothes that accentuate the classic look.

American Literature- Many of my fellow English majors loved that British literature, garbage, but I hated Brit Lit. I got into some Russian authors, some French, but give me American any day of the week. Gatsby’s dream or Hester’s shame… American literature speaks to my struggles and my life.

Three Things I Hate About America:

Ban on Gay Marriage- Only in America, the land of the free, would some citizens be denied basic human rights. It happened to blacks for over a century and it is still happening to same-sex partnerships. Sexy-hot blogger Promiscuous X restarted the discussion and here are some thoughts I shared with him. Gay marriage is not about making anyone accept our lifestyle choices. Instead, the fight for gay marriage is really simple- I have the right to decide who should make my life decisions with me. From buying home, investing in shared stocks, or what will happen with my remains after death, I have the right to have my same-sex partner make those decisions with or for me.

I love Parker. If I was in a critical accident tomorrow, he would not even be able to visit me. If I died, he would get kicked out of our home and my family could possibly not even include him in funeral plans and arrangements. That is just one scenario. What if this happens fifteen years down the road? Or thirty?

Gay marriage is not about acceptance, some “I’m here, I’m queer” bullshit. It is about civil rights that we deserve as Americans who pay taxes and pay into retirement funds and social security. What happens to my retirement money when I die before my partner? It’s my money, but it will not go to the man I share my life with and that is a problem. That is the biggest reason I hate America.

George Bush’s Reign of Idocity- This moron steals the presidency and then runs-amok for eight years, destroying our economy, the Middle East, and our international reputation in the process. I hate George Bush. And because WE made his reign possible, I hate America.

Fox News- While I fully support and value free speech, I hate the Fox News network and everyone associated with Fox News. From their incorrect portrayals of Obama, to their constant push to reconstruct American history of government, the Fox News Network helped Bush win election and helped him blind the American people to the truth regarding the war in Iraq. I hate Fox News and because a large portion of Americans watched that garbage, I hate America.