Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Corey does Dallas...


I have been in Dallas for two days, and still Parker has not accepted any of my calls. I am really pissed off. And hurt.

I am here for work training and it is horrible- worse than I expected. It is a struggle to stay awake. The entire training could have occurred in one day. I had what I needed in one day- the three remaining days are pointless.

Last night I went to Zippers with Joe. Zippers is a small gay bar. It’s the Tuesday night spot. The drinks were cheap and great. Zippers even has strippers, but they are not so great. They are all white and unpropotionatedly muscular.

Imagine a pasty looking white guy, dancing this heart out (but not his ass off, um, cause there was no ass) on a black box. He was moving and gyrating to something, but it was not to a beat that I could hear. I had no idea what he was hearing, but it was not to the beat. Don’t think it can get any worse? Now imagine him in nothing but a teal green thong.

When a hip hop song came on, the dancers would do their best impersonation of a black person. They would throw hands in the air, pout their lips, and give their best b-boy stance.

Someone needs to unzip Zippers and put this place out of its misery.

25 comments:

One Man’s Opinion said...

I use to work that area, before I was labled a homo-phobe (which I am not). There is a black club, or there use to be, called the Metro..which is downtown. I think it is own Elm street, but don't qoute me. And I think there is a place on Fitzhugh, that use to be off the chain. I suck on giving information on any hot spots, and since I have not worked over in that area for over five years, I don't know what is going on in that area any more. Wish I could help you out more.

Q said...

Oh, baby go home! Not "black impersonation"? Were they in black face?

Darius T. Williams said...

Um, doesn't sound too fun. It really doesn't. Well, at least you're getting paid for it, right?

Dusty Boot said...

Teal green thong... priceless.

Gary T. P. said...

LOL@ unzip Zippers...oh Corey

PRIMO said...

LMAO! Comedy at the unzip Comment. Most of been horrible having to watch ass-less strippers in thongs. I Cringe @ the thought.

bLaQ~n~MiLD said...

Ok, first of all Parker Brothers needs to stop playing Monopoly with his voice and say WTF he got to say so ya'll can squash this shit! I can't stand a dude that will sit and sulk or be consumed with an attitude rather than say what you got to say and keep it movin!

Zippers eh...? Interesting. You should've jumped up there and showed them how it's done Corey! I would've paid good money to see that! LMAO!

~Damnit!

fuzzy said...

I need to know where are the pictures of this! Where are the pics!!! lol

As for you and Parker, maybe time and space is a thing here. I wont go any further with advise issues, I have my own! But wait it out and be patient...

AcousticSoul said...

Corey, you are too funny! Teal green thong? B Boy stance? I hate when white boys do that. UGH! Just be yourself.

Crazy Diamond said...

With all my issues, I have no business giving advice, but here's a couple of thoughts:

1.) You have taken steps to initiate a discussion. It is time for Parker to show his character.

2.) Distance is not always a bad thing, even though nothing is more irritating than silence or cold, short text messages. Don't be afraid of the distance. Just don't do anything while you're away that you won't be ready to share with Parker when you two reunite.

Turn me up a lil said...

Don't geek That dude's head up. Stop callin him....he'll come around eventually.

[jei.lamar] said...

Okay, so i SERIOUSLY thought I was the only one who noticed that the strippers at Zippers were a bit off..to me it seemed as though all of them were tone deaf & couldn't even catch the back beat of a song.. that unzip zippers.. CLASSIC COMEDY!!!

C. Baptiste-Williams said...

you know you got your life... lol

Corey Keith said...

One Man, I hope I get to see you before I head out...

Q- they were not in black face, just in black posture and moves.

Darius, I am not getting paid one poot.

Blaq, I would've stripped, but I am afraid they would have closed the bar due to public indeceny (you know I don't wear drawz...)

Fuzzy, I tried to take pics but the lighting was low and the iphone has a crappy camera.

Crazy, I have done my best to intitate, but will keep trying..

turn me up- I will keep trying... Parker needs me to beg and kiss his butt and I am happy (ok, not really happy) to do it because it is what he needs. I was wrong for yelling and I have to do whatever it takes to make it right... Pride aside... If he needs me to stroke his ego, like I stroke his...I will do it.


j.e... I am so glad you know the foolishness that was my Tuesday night...

c. baptiste.. if this is life, baby.. I am over it..

Promiscuous X said...

Please stop LMMFAO . I cant take it LOL. Remind me to never go there when im in DALLAS lol. I hate when the lil white boys with NO ass try to drop it like its hot and they be letting down like its warm lol or frozen for that matter.

Tell Parker we gone fight werd up and stop actn like a bitch and answer the dam phone.

BronzeBuckaroo said...

LOL! at your reaction to this gay joint. I'm not a club person myself. Pretty much decided a long time ago such venues wasn't the place for me whether they be mixed crowd, mostly white, black etc.

Parker is probably okay, just busy doing a whatever you shouldn't let an active imagination cause you to worry about. No doubt by the time you wrote this post or shortly thereafter, you two talked.

Nario said...

wow assless eh? I am glad I haven't ventured out to party yet in Texas...I think imma keep my ass at home, lmao.

If you want quality then I suggest the Dominican Republic, Sao Paulo,
Technotilan Mexico, off the chain spots where quality strippers and drinks set the back ground for a good night or day for that matter!

Chet said...

Man you and Parker better get your shyte together. I think you brothas are allowing this matter to linger to long; when you get home handle your business holla at a brotha face to face.

Corey doing Dallas; sorry my brotha Dallas has been done... LOL.
Dallas is a nice town however; you should be pleased that you are inside at the training/conference because it gets hot in Texas, I did my undergrad work there and it was horrible during summer.

Corey how could you have sit through the stripper's performance at that bar? I don't do bars that do not feature Black sexy dancers, it is a must because this brotha loves the strippers. Houston is the shyte the brothas have nice big ol bubble butts.

Hope that things come together for you.

deonte' k said...

Lmao @ the unzip zippers comment!

Aww Parker needs to stop it now. I would be hurt too. Sorry ur going through that buddy.

WhozHe said...

Next time you in the Big D, holla at a brotha.

D-Place said...

Sorry about Parker. I'd be hurt and mad. Do what's best for you.

I went to a club like that in Atlanta called Swinging Richards...but they did have 2 brothas that were on point.

yet another black guy said...

they thought they were about to get mad tips up there hahahaha

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