Wednesday, June 16, 2010

You know your new guy is not a top when...


So Courtney called me Monday to update me on his situation with his lover.
Courtney as you remember is my friend who teaches at a school in North Carolina and who was dating a student who attends the school.

Well, while he and the student still have sex (great, dirty, nasty sex according to his perspective), they broke up and he has recently met a new guy he is every excited about. They met in the barbershop and he had no idea the guy got down. They have had two dates and both ended with some hot scrounging around. Courtney is a top and he is convinced the new guy (light skinned, hot lips, and dreds) is a top as well.

Oh lil Courtney! Let Corey school you!
You know your new guy is not a top when his a$s smells like vanilla.
A top’s ass does not exude any PLEASANT fragrance other than the occasional BAR soap.

You know your new guy is not a top when he washes with a loofa and a bottle of soap.
Most tops (70% of them) use manly smelling bar soaps. While a few will scrub down with sponges, most acquire some pretty funky nuts and need a good old fashioned towel and bar soap for all those hard to reach places.

You know your new guy is not a top when his hands have top coat.
I know a pedi and mani is the thing to do every now and then. But, really… a top coat? That’s taking the metrosexual a little too far for most tops.


You know your new guy is not a top when he calls you daddy in the middle of sex.
I know Twista and Usher have re-popularized the old role play standard, but tops don’t go for daddies. They are the daddies. So if he calls you daddy, then you are the daddy (i.e. TOP) and he’s the mommy. PERIOD.

So I was telling Courtney this, while on the phone, at the ATM.
And then, I was held-up... at gun point… by two FU@KING goons!

10 comments:

Turn me up a lil said...

OMG R u OK???

Corey Keith said...

I am now... text me so I can have your number. Hopefully I'll see you at the white party!

Chet said...

He could very well be a top, just not the manly manly type. Spa Boi and such.

Anonymous said...

Thats so old fashion and late to still consider that a top has to be a manly man. I am a top and i love to smell fresh. I buy manly fresh smelling items. This often times leads to issues in the relationships when people have to have such a distinction of this is what a top is and this is what a bottom is. Many times a person who thinks they are a top and has to be so manly is only because a male figure was missing in the house they grew up in and they are trying to act as what they think a manly man is. My father cooked, cleaned and today loves the smell of candles and nice soaps. He is still a man. I think this is another negative aspect of black gays and relationships. White do not really get into the roles.

thegayte-keeper said...

ARE YOU OKAY?

Anonymous said...

I like the valuable info you provide in your articles.
I'll bookmark your blog and check again here frequently. I am quite sure I will learn many new stuff right here! Best of luck for the next!

Also visit my site - http://204.169.201.25/groups/webwork/wiki/03286/Eliminate_your_Early_comprar_viagra_Reasons_With_virtually_no_Straining_Penile_enhancement_Movements.html

ninest123 said...

nike outlet, louis vuitton, ugg boots, chanel handbags, replica watches, kate spade outlet, longchamp, longchamp outlet, oakley sunglasses, oakley sunglasses, cheap oakley sunglasses, michael kors, polo ralph lauren outlet, louboutin outlet, prada handbags, ray ban sunglasses, louboutin, longchamp pas cher, tiffany and co, nike free, air max, louboutin shoes, christian louboutin outlet, polo ralph lauren outlet, ray ban sunglasses, louboutin pas cher, sac longchamp, louis vuitton outlet, oakley sunglasses, ray ban sunglasses, tiffany jewelry, jordan shoes, air jordan pas cher, gucci outlet, nike free, tory burch outlet, louis vuitton outlet, ugg boots, nike roshe run, nike air max, nike air max, uggs on sale, louis vuitton, burberry, ralph lauren pas cher, replica watches, longchamp outlet, louis vuitton, prada outlet, oakley sunglasses

ninest123 said...

true religion jeans, hogan, ray ban uk, michael kors outlet, burberry outlet online, coach outlet, coach outlet, coach purses, north face, timberland, burberry, north face, tn pas cher, michael kors, nike roshe, michael kors outlet, vans pas cher, ugg boots, nike air max, michael kors outlet, air force, lacoste pas cher, ralph lauren uk, michael kors, nike air max, ugg boots, michael kors, hermes, michael kors outlet, true religion outlet, kate spade handbags, nike blazer, hollister, oakley pas cher, michael kors, vanessa bruno, new balance pas cher, hollister pas cher, nike free run uk, replica handbags, true religion jeans, converse pas cher, mulberry, abercrombie and fitch, ray ban pas cher, sac guess, true religion jeans, lululemon, nike air max, michael kors outlet

ninest123 said...

ferragamo shoes, north face outlet, asics running shoes, babyliss, converse outlet, abercrombie and fitch, reebok shoes, p90x workout, ghd, timberland boots, oakley, nike air max, mcm handbags, ray ban, giuseppe zanotti, beats by dre, louboutin, wedding dresses, celine handbags, mont blanc, hollister, jimmy choo shoes, nfl jerseys, new balance, baseball bats, vans, ralph lauren, gucci, soccer jerseys, iphone cases, chi flat iron, hollister, nike air max, nike trainers, insanity workout, instyler, soccer shoes, nike roshe, lululemon, longchamp, nike huarache, herve leger, birkin bag, valentino shoes, converse, mac cosmetics, vans shoes, bottega veneta, north face outlet, hollister

ninest123 said...

links of london, louis vuitton, moncler, moncler, swarovski, swarovski crystal, juicy couture outlet, barbour, hollister, bottes ugg, louis vuitton, sac louis vuitton pas cher, pandora jewelry, karen millen, toms shoes, coach outlet, thomas sabo, ugg boots uk, moncler, lancel, ugg,uggs,uggs canada, moncler, ugg pas cher, canada goose outlet, juicy couture outlet, ugg,ugg australia,ugg italia, louis vuitton, moncler outlet, canada goose, canada goose, canada goose uk, montre pas cher, canada goose outlet, moncler, pandora jewelry, moncler, canada goose, louis vuitton, wedding dresses, doudoune canada goose, pandora charms, supra shoes, barbour jackets, marc jacobs, moncler, canada goose, replica watches, pandora charms