Thursday, March 19, 2009

The Reason, Part Three

B.J. was not gay.

Often, while walking to the lake, we held hands.
Many nights, we would fall asleep on each other or in each other’s arms. Hard and sticky with sweat, we would just be together on the couch on in the bed or on the floor, wrapped inside of each other. Usually when we fell asleep, we would have on gym shorts and no shirts.

B.J. was not gay.

He always smelled sweet, strong, comfortable. He radiated masculinity and sex. He was taller than me, slightly over six feet in high school. He was lighter than me, a reddish brown complexion. He had a square jaw, strong neck, broad shoulders. His hair was reddish, blondish on his body and abdomen. His dick was thick and long when soft. I never saw it any other way. That is how I know.

B.J. was not gay.

While my dick was always hard as a rock whenever I smelled him, saw him, touched him, thought of him, his never was. Not when I laid on him, wrestled him, skinny dipped with him, his dick was never hard.

B.J. was not gay. And he had fallen in love with Chanel the way I had fallen in love with him.


Dusty Boot said...

You're torturing me.

JB said...

B.J. was not gay, yet he participated in all of that.Hmm, VERY Intriguing.

Crazy Diamond said...

I love it, and can 100 percent relate. With two best friends in particular, one of whom slept in the same bed with me for four years from the ages of 14-18, there was that very blurred lined between intimacy and romance.

One of them and I were sexual together, and one was just deep intimacy. I believe both of them are straight, and don't believe they're trying to hide or run away from anything. I explored sexually with females as a teenager, but I know I am not straight.

That said, I wouldn't put past them to desire or have that type of relationship with another man, just like I sometimes have curiosities or desires to be with a woman [and a man :)]. In youth and adulthood, the room to explore who we might think we are is very limited by labels and expectations.

Troy N. said...

I saw BJ at Nordstroms and he looked so good in them jeans, you would've loved it.

4GOTTEN1 said...

I didn't think it would end like this how did you end up dealing with it all?

Losojosnuevos said...

Life has taught me that men who embody sensitive qualities are not necessarily homosexual. Rather, it is often wishful thinking on our parts. I've had a similar experience, but this is your story.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like BJ knew you were gay and was a you jumping in lakes with a hard dick and he just teasing you. BJ knew you wanted some of him. (both ways)....WHere is BJ him up.

catchingupat20 said...

That was a sad, but beautifully written story, and I definite relate.

LongOverdo said...

Man...and he seemed like the ideal dude too